CÓMO ACOMPAÑAR A VUESTROS HIJOS E HIJAS EN SUS FRUSTRACIONES

Publicado el

Las frustraciones forman parte de la vida, así que ayudar a nuestros hijos e hijas a manejarlas es necesario; ya que la vida está llena de ellas.

A menudo una situación frustrante puede estar acompañada de una rabieta, expresión de emociones como el enfado, la rabia… o en ocasiones pueden ser vividas por los niños como una situación que les bloquea.

Ante una situación de bloqueo los niños pueden responder de muchas maneras: con agresividad, con la huida, con el pasotismo o abandono de lo que estaban haciendo, con la negación enfrentarse a ello, etc.

En nuestra charla del pasado 26 de enero, surgieron algunas preguntas cómo:

 

¿Pero debemos dejar qué nuestros hijos se frustren?

 

Por supuesto que si, la frustración es necesaria para aprender a enfrentarse a los conflictos de la vida.

Si cuando nuestros hijos se frustran, enseguida les resolvemos el motivo de su frustración, les estamos privando de una oportunidad para superarse a sí mismos, para trabajar su razonamiento, su esfuerzo y aprender a gestionar sus emociones.

Normalmente las frustraciones aparecen de un conflicto o situación que el niño no sabe cómo resolver, o al que no desea enfrentarse (por miedo generalmente al propio juicio o al juicio del otro).

Pero también debemos saber que exponer a nuestros hijos a situaciones que pueden ser frustrantes para ellos, porque no les corresponden por su edad puede ser perjudicial para ellos. Por ejemplo: dejar a un niño pequeño de 6 años al cuidado de hermano aún más pequeño.

Es decir, las frustraciones deben de entrar dentro del sentido común, respetando el desarrollo del niño. Y por otro lado teniendo la seguridad de que son retos que con un poco de persistencia y esfuerzo el niño va a poder lograr.

 

 

¿Qué podemos hacer cuándo nuestros hijos se frustran para ayudarles?

 

Lo más importante es ESCUCHAR, con eso quiero decir entender lo que a nuestro hijo o hija le está pasando, de ese modo seremos capaces de EMPATIZAR con ellos y ponernos en su lugar.

P.ej: Un niño intenta construir un lego, pero las piezas no encajan y se le destruye todo el tiempo. Él niño puede responder con enfado y tirando todas las piezas por la sala.

Ante esta situación podemos ayudar al niño verbalizando lo que creemos que está sintiendo, “ya veo que no puedes construir esta parte te has enfadado”.

Cuando nuestros hijos sienten que entendemos lo que les está pasando, les ayuda a relajarse ante la situación. Aunque esto no quiere decir que la resuelvan, pueden seguir frustrados.

El siguiente paso sería, buscar una SOLUCIÓN a su frustración. NO RESOLVERLES LA FRUSTRACIÓN.

Buscar una solución implica que el niño, busque estrategias, sus propias estrategias para resolver la situación. A veces pueden resultarnos extrañas, o directamente ver que de ese modo no van a resolver la situación; pero debemos dejar que prueben y busquen la solución por sí mismos, aunque se equivoquen.

Por supuesto que les podemos ofrecer ayuda, PARA BUSCAR UNA SOLUCIÓN, y si la aceptan podemos sugerirles lo que nosotros haríamos.

 

¿Por qué se frustran siempre con las mismas cosas y no son capaces de resolverlas?

 

En estas situaciones debemos observar si esa situación o circunstancia está muy por encima de su capacidad para poder resolverla.

En otras ocasiones, el juicio del adulto (papá, mamá, profesor, entrenador…) puede bloquear al niño. P.ej: Un niño en un entrenamiento de fútbol practica una jugada, pero no le sale, su entrenador se enfada, le grita y le dice que no se está enterando de lo que le dice.

Muchas veces, ante las frustraciones de nuestros hijos, o la expresión de emociones “negativas” los adultos juzgamos al niño (“es que no escuchas”, “es que eres malo” “eres un vago” “no te esfuerzas”). Este juicio hace que el niño se quede bloqueado en la situación y no pueda resolverla.

Para acompañar a los niños en estas situaciones frustrantes, es importante la CALMA, no juzgar al niño, verbalizar lo que está pasando y sobretodo CONFIAR EN NUESTROS HIJOS E HIJAS.

Cuando los niños sienten que el adulto que les acompaña CONFÍA en ellos es capaz de superar todos los obstáculos.

 

¿Qué podemos hacer si evitan frustrarse y a la mínima abandonan lo que les frustra?

 

El miedo al fracaso, ya sea consigo mismo o el miedo a defraudar a los demás puede ser muy invalidante. La falta de confianza o seguridad en los adultos de referencia o progenitores puede bloquear al niño.

 

Por otro lado, esto también puede deberse a que el niño siente una carga de juicio muy pesada encima de él; pero también puede estar relacionado con una escasa MOTIVACIÓN, FALTA DE DESEO por seguir avanzando en un aprendizaje o en la vida.

En estos casos deberíamos de intentar descubrir cuál es la raíz de la falta de motivación para poder ayudarles.

También destacar que si hasta el momento, ante los conflictos o posibles frustraciones los adultos que acompañan al niño le han resuelto sus frustraciones; provocan en el niño o niña una desgana, falta de interés por enfrentarse a la frustración, ya que sabe que el adulto que le acompaña, antes o después le acabará resolviendo el conflicto.

“Para que me voy a esforzar, si me quejo, o lloro un poco, consigo que me hagan las cosas o que me presten atención”.

El niño o niña aprende a resolver los problemas a través del adulto. En estos casos también, ya que es el adulto el que asume la responsabilidad de resolver esa frustración, si esta no se resuelve, el niño o niña suele culpabilizar al adulto de su frustración. “Por culpa tuya, si tú me hubieses ayudado, no pasaría esto”.

 

Es decir, el niño o la niña no se hace RESPONSABLE de resolver sus propias frustraciones.

 

En conclusión, es importante la CALMA, ser empáticos con nuestros hijos, hacerles responsables de resolver sus propias frustraciones (acompañándoles en el proceso) y CONFIAR en ellos.

“Enfrentarse a un conflicto o bache siempre es más fácil si me siento acompañado, entendido y siento que las personas que me acompañan CONFÍAN EN MI”.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2.391 comentarios en “CÓMO ACOMPAÑAR A VUESTROS HIJOS E HIJAS EN SUS FRUSTRACIONES

  1. Please let me know if you’re looking for a article writer for your blog.
    You have some really good posts and I think
    I would be a good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I’d absolutely love
    to write some articles for your blog in exchange for a
    link back to mine. Please blast me an e-mail if interested.
    Regards!

  2. It’s a pity you don’t have a donate button! I’d without a doubt donate to this outstanding blog!

    I guess for now i’ll settle for bookmarking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account.

    I look forward to brand new updates and will talk about this
    website with my Facebook group. Talk soon!

  3. What i do not understood is in truth how you are now not really much
    more well-liked than you may be now. You’re very
    intelligent. You realize thus significantly when it comes to this topic, produced me individually
    believe it from numerous various angles. Its like women and
    men don’t seem to be involved unless it is something to do with Lady gaga!
    Your individual stuffs excellent. Always maintain it up!

  4. I am curious to find out what blog platform you have been utilizing?
    I’m experiencing some small security issues with my latest website and I would
    like to find something more risk-free. Do you have any recommendations?

  5. Hey there, I think your site might be having browser compatibility issues.
    When I look at your blog site in Chrome, it looks
    fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping.
    I just wanted to give you a quick heads up! Other then that, superb blog!

  6. Hello there, just became alert to your blog through Google, and found that it is truly informative.
    I am gonna watch out for brussels. I’ll appreciate if you continue this in future.

    Many people will be benefited from your writing. Cheers!

  7. I do not know whether it’s just me or if everybody else experiencing problems with
    your site. It appears as though some of the text on your content are running off
    the screen. Can someone else please provide feedback and let me know if this is happening to them too?
    This might be a issue with my web browser because
    I’ve had this happen previously. Kudos

  8. Right here is the right web site for anyone who wants to understand this
    topic. You understand a whole lot its almost hard to argue with you (not that I
    personally will need to…HaHa). You definitely put a fresh spin on a topic that has been written about for years.
    Great stuff, just wonderful!

  9. Have you ever considered creating an ebook or guest authoring on other blogs?
    I have a blog centered on the same topics you discuss and would really like to
    have you share some stories/information. I know
    my visitors would appreciate your work. If you’re even remotely
    interested, feel free to send me an email.

  10. Having read this I believed it was really
    enlightening. I appreciate you finding the time and effort to
    put this article together. I once again find myself personally spending way
    too much time both reading and posting comments.

    But so what, it was still worth it!

  11. Good day very nice blog!! Guy .. Beautiful .. Wonderful .. I’ll bookmark your web site and take the feeds alsoKI am glad to find numerous helpful information right here in the post, we need develop extra strategies on this regard, thanks for sharing. . . . . .

  12. Please let me know if you’re looking for a author for your blog.
    You have some really good posts and I think I would be a
    good asset. If you ever want to take some of the load off, I’d love to write some articles for your blog in exchange for a link back to mine.

    Please blast me an e-mail if interested. Regards!

  13. Unquestionably imagine that which you stated. Your favourite reason seemed to be on the net the simplest factor to be mindful of. I say to you, I definitely get irked even as people consider worries that they plainly don’t know about. You managed to hit the nail upon the top as smartly as defined out the entire thing with no need side effect , folks could take a signal. Will probably be again to get more. Thank you

  14. My programmer is trying to persuade me to move to .net from PHP.
    I have always disliked the idea because of the expenses.
    But he’s tryiong none the less. I’ve been using Movable-type
    on numerous websites for about a year and am concerned about switching to another platform.
    I have heard good things about blogengine.net.
    Is there a way I can transfer all my wordpress posts into it?
    Any kind of help would be greatly appreciated!

  15. Hey, I think your website might be having browser compatibility issues. When I look at your blog in Firefox, it looks fine but when opening in Internet Explorer, it has some overlapping. I just wanted to give you a quick heads up! Other then that, fantastic blog!

  16. Have you ever thought about adding a little bit more
    than just your articles? I mean, what you say is valuable and everything.
    But think of if you added some great pictures or videos to give
    your posts more, «pop»! Your content is excellent but with images and videos, this blog could certainly be one of the greatest
    in its niche. Very good blog!

  17. I was wondering if you ever thought of changing the page layout of your website? Its very well written; I love what youve got to say. But maybe you could a little more in the way of content so people could connect with it better. Youve got an awful lot of text for only having one or two images. Maybe you could space it out better?

  18. Undeniably believe that that you said. Your favorite reason appeared to be on the internet the easiest factor to have in mind of. I say to you, I certainly get annoyed even as folks consider concerns that they plainly do not know about. You controlled to hit the nail upon the highest and outlined out the entire thing with no need side effect , people could take a signal. Will probably be back to get more. Thanks

  19. Excellent post. I was checking continuously this weblog and I am impressed!
    Extremely useful information specially the closing
    phase 🙂 I maintain such info much. I was looking for this certain information for a very long time.
    Thanks and good luck. natalielise plenty of fish

  20. I think that what you said was very logical. However, think
    about this, suppose you added a little content?
    I mean, I don’t want to tell you how to run your website, however what
    if you added a title that grabbed a person’s attention? I mean CÓMO ACOMPAÑAR A
    VUESTROS HIJOS E HIJAS EN SUS FRUSTRACIONES | Psicoeducere is kinda plain. You might look at Yahoo’s home page and see how they write article titles to
    grab people to open the links. You might add a video or a related picture
    or two to get people excited about everything’ve got to say.
    Just my opinion, it would make your posts a little livelier.

  21. Hi, I believe your web site could possibly be having internet browser compatibility issues.

    Whenever I take a look at your site in Safari, it
    looks fine but when opening in IE, it’s got some overlapping issues.
    I merely wanted to provide you with a quick
    heads up! Aside from that, fantastic blog! natalielise plenty of
    fish

  22. Nice weblog right here! Additionally your web site quite a bit up very fast!
    What host are you using? Can I get your affiliate hyperlink in your
    host? I wish my web site loaded up as fast
    as yours lol

  23. It is truly a great and helpful piece of information. I’m satisfied
    that you simply shared this helpful info with us. Please keep us up to date like this.

    Thank you for sharing.

  24. Having read this I thought it was rather informative.
    I appreciate you taking the time and effort to put this article together.

    I once again find myself spending a significant amount of time
    both reading and leaving comments. But so what, it was still worthwhile!
    plenty of fish natalielise

  25. Its like you read my mind! You appear to know so much about this,
    like you wrote the book in it or something.
    I think that you can do with a few pics to drive the message home a bit, but instead of that,
    this is wonderful blog. A fantastic read. I’ll definitely be back.
    pof natalielise

  26. Hi! I could have sworn I’ve been to this site before but
    after browsing through some of the posts I realized it’s
    new to me. Nonetheless, I’m definitely happy I found it and
    I’ll be bookmarking it and checking back regularly!

  27. Hi, i feel that i saw you visited my blog thus i came to “go back the choose”.I’m trying to to find issues to enhance my site!I guess its adequate to use some of your ideas!!

  28. Its like you learn my mind! You appear to understand so much
    approximately this, like you wrote the e-book in it or something.
    I think that you simply can do with some % to force the message
    home a bit, but other than that, that is magnificent blog.
    An excellent read. I will certainly be back.

  29. After checking out a handful of the blog posts on your website,
    I really like your technique of writing a blog. I saved as a favorite it to
    my bookmark website list and will be checking back soon. Take a
    look at my website as well and tell me your opinion.

  30. It’s perfect time to make some plans for the future
    and it is time to be happy. I’ve read this post and if
    I could I wish to suggest you some interesting things or suggestions.
    Maybe you can write next articles referring
    to this article. I desire to read more things about it!

  31. Hello there, just became aware of your blog through Google,
    and found that it is really informative. I am going to watch out
    for brussels. I’ll appreciate if you continue this in future.
    Many people will be benefited from your writing. Cheers!

  32. I do consider all of the ideas you have presented
    on your post. They’re really convincing and can certainly work.

    Still, the posts are too quick for newbies. Could you please prolong them
    a bit from subsequent time? Thanks for the post.

  33. Hi there I am so happy I found your webpage, I really found you by accident, while I was browsing on Google for something else, Anyhow I am here now and would just like to say thanks a lot for a remarkable post and a all round entertaining blog (I also love the theme/design), I don’t have time to read it all at the minute but I have bookmarked it and also added in your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read more, Please do keep up the awesome work.

  34. Door Repair
    Are you looking for a Toronto & the GTA door service company near you? We are your trusted door and locksmith experts that you can count on. If you have a new door that needs installation or if you have a problem with your door and lock from a break-in, we will fix it on the spot. Our specialist provides a valuable and affordable service to our commercial and residential customers and offers a 1-year industry standard manufacturer warranty on any of our hardware products.

  35. You actually make it seem so easy with your presentation but I find this topic to be actually something that I think I would never understand.

    It seems too complex and very broad for me. I am
    looking forward for your next post, I’ll try to get the hang of it!

  36. It is appropriate time to make some plans for the future and it is time to be happy. I have read this post and if I could I wish to suggest you few interesting things or advice. Perhaps you can write next articles referring to this article. I wish to read even more things about it!

  37. I am only commenting to make you know of the brilliant discovery our girl gained reading your web page. She picked up some things, including what it’s like to have an excellent teaching character to make many people clearly fully understand chosen advanced issues. You undoubtedly surpassed our own expectations. Many thanks for providing such valuable, dependable, explanatory and even cool tips about your topic to Sandra.

  38. The misery that best generic cialis allergic reactions can trigger is something with viagra prescription online which unimaginable numbers of individuals are familiar with. The fact is, nevertheless, that there are services available for those that seek them. Start utilizing the ideas and pointers in this piece, as well as you will certainly have the tools essential to overcome allergies, finally.
    Screen pollen forecasts and also plan appropriately. If you have access to the net, much of the popular weather forecasting sites have actually an area committed to allergy forecasts including both air high quality as well as pollen matters. On days when the count is mosting likely to be high, maintain your home windows closed as well as restrict your time outdoors.
    Shower before bed, taking unique care to clean your hair thoroughly. cialis-canada Plant pollen, dirt, as well as drug store other irritants can get trapped on your skin and in your hair as you undergo your day. Consider switching to an evening routine if you typically shower in the morning. This will provide you the chance to get rid of these toxic irritants before bed, enabling you to have a relaxed evening’s rest.

  39. I am really impressed with your writing abilities and also with the structure to your blog.
    Is that this a paid topic or did you customize it your self?
    Anyway stay up the nice high quality writing, it’s
    uncommon to see a nice weblog like this one these days..

  40. The pain that over the counter viagra allergic reactions can create is something with buy viagra australia which unknown varieties of people are familiar with. The reality is, nonetheless, that there are options readily available for those that seek them. Beginning making use of the suggestions and also suggestions in this piece, and you will have the devices required to conquer allergies, at last.
    Screen pollen forecasts and strategy as necessary. Numerous of the prominent climate projecting websites have a section dedicated to allergy forecasts consisting of both air top quality and also pollen counts if you have access to the web. On days when the count is mosting likely to be high, maintain your home windows closed and also limit your time outdoors.
    Plant pollen, dirt, and also other allergens can get trapped on your skin and in your hair as you go via your day. If you generally shower in the early morning, take into consideration switching over to an evening timetable.

  41. Hi there just wanted to give you a brief heads up and let
    you know a few of the images aren’t loading correctly.

    I’m not sure why but I think its a linking issue.
    I’ve tried it in two different web browsers and both show the same outcome.

  42. I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme. Did you create this
    website yourself or did you hire someone
    to do it for you? Plz respond as I’m looking to construct
    my own blog and would like to find out where u got this from.
    thank you

  43. Thank you for your own labor on this blog. My mom enjoys managing investigations and it is easy to understand why. My partner and i hear all about the powerful mode you give helpful steps on your web site and therefore cause participation from other ones on the issue so our girl is really being taught so much. Take pleasure in the remaining portion of the new year. You are always performing a brilliant job.
    sildenafil not working

  44. A formidable share, I just given this onto a colleague who was doing slightly analysis on this. And he actually bought me breakfast as a result of I discovered it for him.. smile. So let me reword that: Thnx for the treat! However yeah Thnkx for spending the time to discuss this, I really feel strongly about it and love reading extra on this topic. If possible, as you change into expertise, would you thoughts updating your weblog with extra details? It is extremely helpful for me. Huge thumb up for this blog put up!
    Source: what is a good medical school http://www.viapriceusa.com

  45. I loved as much as you’ll receive carried out right here. The sketch is tasteful, your authored subject matter stylish. nonetheless, you command get got an edginess over that you wish be delivering the following. unwell unquestionably come further formerly again as exactly the same nearly a lot often inside case you shield this increase.
    duration of sildenafil

  46. The very crux of your writing whilst appearing reasonable in the beginning, did not really work well with me personally after some time. Somewhere within the sentences you actually were able to make me a believer unfortunately just for a very short while. I still have got a problem with your leaps in logic and you might do well to fill in all those gaps. If you can accomplish that, I will undoubtedly be impressed.
    Source: heat stroke warning signs http://www.viapriceusa.com

  47. It’s a pity you don’t have a donate button! I’d definitely donate to this excellent blog! I suppose for now i’ll settle for bookmarking and adding your RSS feed to my Google account. I look forward to new updates and will share this site with my Facebook group. Chat soon!

  48. The subsequent time I read a weblog, I hope that it doesnt disappoint me as much as this one. I imply, I know it was my option to learn, however I actually thought youd have one thing interesting to say. All I hear is a bunch of whining about one thing that you could fix in the event you werent too busy looking for attention.

  49. Interesting blog! Is your theme custom made or did
    you download it from somewhere? A theme like yours with a few simple adjustements would really make my blog jump out.

    Please let me know where you got your design. Kudos